Many of you have heard, seen, or re-posted that quote, which I have personally titled, “Don’t Settle” (below).
Most of the things on this list are quite sweet and something I feel all women deserve. Although some of these things I find to be a little much. I personally don’t think it’s necessary to stare at me while I sleep, kind of creepy. I also don’t need to be constantly reminded how much you care. To me actions speak much louder than words, but that’s just me.
August 22nd of 2012 me and my husband celebrated our eight year anniversary of dating. We have been together for quite some time and throughout that time we have had some major up’s and down’s. When it was good, it was amazing, but when it was bad, it was the worst- very common. We actually broke up for a wee bit, but like they say, “absence makes the heart grow fonder” and that couldn’t have been more true in our case. I think in our instance, intuition and maturity really played a major role. There are some things not worth giving up on and that is how Matt and I came to be married.
Anyhow, I thought I could make my own list of things I feel women should try to find in a guy. Some of the things on my list don’t happen right away of course, but if a man is able to do these things, I feel he is the ultimate keeper.
Find a guy who…
- Has absolutely no problem running to the store to get tampons when an unexpected disaster happens. He knows your brand, your absorbency preference, and comes back with some sort of dessert.
- When asked about you for the first time, he doesn’t start out with a description of your looks, rather how awesome you are and how you make him feel.
- Will let you control the remote, even when his favorite football team is playing.
- Within a group setting, claims he farted when he obviously knows you did, to save you from embarrassment.
- When sleeping on his back, snoring very loudly, will politely turn over when you tap him. As he turns over, in his sleep he tells you how much he loves you. If this is an unconscious thought, it has to be true right?
- Offers you his last bite of food, no matter what he is eating.
- Let’s you take over most of the bed when you sleep, even though you might be half his size.
- Packs your lunch in the morning and leaves a little love note, to be discovered later.
- Will take off the nail polish from one of your fingers, if you bump it while giving yourself a manicure.
- Will carry you up numerous flights of stairs day in and day out if you ever break a bone.
- Is not afraid to call you sweet, endearing pet names in front of his friends.
- Understands and respects that a girl’s father is her number one man.
- Knows that his fashion sense isn’t as good as yours and allows you to buy his clothes and pick out outfits for him.
- Knows when something is wrong without your having to say, and tries to make you feel better.
- Truly enjoys spending time with you, and lets you know during work, that he is excited to get home to you.
- Still plans date nights and romantic getaways, no matter how long you have been together.
- Remembers pinnacle moments in your relationship and enjoys reminiscing.
- Isn’t afraid to be vulnerable in front of you.
- Isn’t afraid to share his dreams, goals, and emotions with you and also enjoys hearing yours.
- Loves to admire you, when you are laughing, dancing, singing, telling a story, just sitting watching television.
- Respects you, but challenges you and calls you out when necessary- honesty is a big deal.
- Backs you up, especially in the rare instance when you disagree with his mother.
- Keeps up his appearance for you, because as a female we are always trying to impress and it is nice when it is reciprocated.
- Keeps the excitement alive and surprises you with things, just because.
- In the shower, while taking turns, doesn’t mind letting you go first. Even though the alternative is freezing, waiting not under the water.
- Prays with you.
- Doesn’t let you go to sleep upset.
- Is like a security blanket and always makes you feel safe.
- Appreciates and understands your independence.
- Will let you stand up for yourself, but doesn’t allow anyone disrespect you.
- Doesn’t tell you to “calm down” “chill” or “relax”, if those happen to be your pet peeves.
- Trusts you and doesn’t give you a reason to ever not trust him.
- Is good at managing money, especially if you have a shopping addiction.
- If when you are upset and say, “do not touch me” he embraces you ever so gently (much like the scene in the movie Spanglish when the daughter tells her mom she needs space and her mom explains “they” don’t do space) because he knows you and deep down that is not really what you want.
- Thinks of your birthday as his favorite holiday.
- Gets you flowers, even though you say you don’t like flowers. A special surprise delivery at work is always special.
- Tells you that you are beautiful every day.
- Inspires you and makes you a better person.
Yes, this is a random selection of things. Some are very specific and you might ask yourself, does this person exist? Honestly, everything on this list my husband has done or continues to do for me. Of course all men are not the same, but I find women settle so often, and there is no need to do that, because everyone’s perfect person is out there. To me, Matt is perfect and I am so blessed to call him mine (True Blood reference, lol)! I certainly hope everyone finds their perfect match. Do not settle ladies. And gentleman, take notes!
This is really bad news for all the Italian guys out there! “Backs you up, especially in the rare instance when you disagree with his mother.”
I appreciate this post Jazzy. I’m happy that you recognize the way that I love you and appreciate it so. You mean everything to me and I would like nothing more than to listen to your heart beat for days on end.
Love,
Matt